Disney's California Adventure

Yesterday we went to the Disney parks. Parts of the day were rough for me cause the place is filled with memories that I cant seem to get away from. They are all over CA but some places are worse than others and Disneyland parks are one of the worst.

Anyway-I wont bore you all with details, but here are some of the good pictures of the day.

Me with Sully (there is a lot of memories wrapped up in this one picture). Funny thing was the "guy" (it hopefully was a guy!) wouldnt let go after the picture-"he" hugged me a whole bunch of times, lol


More shoe photography


Andrea and Hilda on the swings




This is Hilda and I on a ride (yes I was on the phone while the ride was going)


Hilda and I on the Swings

I Made It!

I did it! Im so proud of myself. I managed to make it through this vacation without contacting M. During the last few weeks it has been so hard not to. I had to talk myself out of 'just driving by' soooo many times.

It only got worst after my car accident. Family is great but there isnt anything like that 'special' hug that only one person can give you. I kept expecting him to contact me while I was there because usually when Im thinking about him a lot he ends up contacting me...we must still be on the same wave length. But not this time and that was worse (thought its a good thing cause I never could have managed to not talk to him this time).

I get very frustrated with myself that I still feel that pull but there really is no use denying it (though I continue to do so). I really cant imagine ever going back...but like the song says "If I didnt know now what I didnt know then". I may have been living in a dream world but I was much happier in that dream than I am now. Most of the time I manage to pretend like I dont care and that Im not thinking about him but so many things in my life we spent hours talking about. Including my new job that Im getting ready to start...just about every time I put on a pair of scrubs I think about him and his opinion of them (he loved them).

Hopefully now that I have taken the time to blog this I can quit thinking about it and move on.